Please, Mother...

Do I sound like I'm trying to bribe You if I say I can serve You better from this place we're hoping to move to? I honestly worry about what the truth might sound like in stressful situations. And do I even really know what it is to serve You? It's not exactly a secret between us that I've worried about that for a long time. Always concerned that I'm convincing myself, but that You would have something different to say. 

Then I look at it all again... How You have so many forms, and how You are the Soul of the World. How You have protected and guided me. How I have no doubts about devoting myself to You, not even when I have doubts about how I express my devotion.

Do I truly believe I can serve You better in the place we want to move to? Yes, I do. It's a place where we can be safe, heal, and thrive. A place that puts me out in the woods and close to water. A place that gives me opportunities I haven't had in years, and other opportunities I've never had before.

I believe I will have space there to grow into being more of my true self. That potential version of me that has been held back and limited by circumstances for too long. 

And because I have promised to be honest and vulnerable with You, I will tell You, Mother, that I believe we deserve this place. That each of us has been through so much that we deserve to finally have this home. There are many people who deserve so much better than what they have, but not all of us get the opportunity. Here is the opportunity for my family. I can't make promises for other people, but I can promise I will appreciate getting this place. I know how far I've come, and I don't want to give You some list of specific promises that I may not be able to keep, but I can promise gratitude. I can promise making use of the blessings. 

Yes, Mother, I can serve You better there. Please allow me to do so.